Guest Post: I am Failing at Perfection

Hello. My name is Megan and I’m an insecure, imperfect wife and mother of two.

(This is where you say, “Hi, Megan.”)

Sigh. There. I said it. Somehow saying it doesn’t make me feel more whole, though. It doesn’t fix anything or suddenly make me more perfect or confident, but it is the first step.

We live in a world of social media perfection. Everyone only portrays two things online – perfect picturesque moments or complete and utter outrage. Where’s the messy? Where’s the screaming children? Fighting spouses? Cluttered homes? Burned dinners? Where’s the evidence of broken friendships and floundering faiths? Where’s the authenticity?

I used to feel massive amounts of mom guilt. Honestly, I still do most of the time. I feel this need to give my all to everything but it just is not possible. I can’t be perfect at work and home and church. I yell sometimes. Other times I cry. I lose my patience and snap at the kids or Chris. I get tired of cleaning the living room for the fourth time that hour. Sometimes I don’t even want to utter one more word. Other days I feel like I might scream if one more person asks for just one more thing from me. Cue one of my children asking, “Mommy, can I have a snack?” (Insert head smacking emoji.)

I’m cracking under the unrealistic pressure society puts on moms, and women in general, to be perfect. I yearn for transparency and authenticity. I dream of days I can just be me without the pressure of perfection.

Looking around my house, I see authenticity. The laundry is piled on the couch and in baskets because I hate folding just one load of laundry. The counter is cluttered with dishes because once the kids went to bed we flopped on the couch in exhaustion. Shoes and toys scatter across the living room resembling a mine field only experts can maneuver through. I also see love in that chaos.

Yes, we’re messy, but our family laughs. We play. We have paint wars in the backyard and build forts in the living room. Our home is only orderly when people come over because we LIVE here. It will never be Pinterest-worthy, but it is ours. It’s real. It’s authentic, and I have a feeling if more people let their messy, authenticity show they might feel some of the pressure to be perfect come off their shoulders too.

When the pressures become too much, I always run to the same parts of scripture. First, Matthew 11:28-30:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

This scripture always grounds me. It reminds me that I don’t have to go through this journey alone. Yes, I have people I can talk to but I have a Savior who sees my soul on levels no one else can. He sees my heart break and knows how hard I try to hold it together. I love Him for that.

Secondly, I turn to Philippians 4:6-7:

“Do no be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Oh man, let me tell you, that peace of God which freakin’ transcends all understanding is like a balm to my soul.  It soothes and heals all the cracks and weariness that took over when I wasn’t paying attention. I don’t know how often I’ve truly experienced this peace in particular but I know without a doubt that I did last month.

My soul was in turmoil and I turned to God. After days of prayer and journaling, I finally just felt peace. The turmoil was over. Just like that. Say what? It filled every part of me and I knew what I had to do. It was beyond freeing.

Jesus sees my hot mess self and loves me. Sometimes I imagine He looks at me with humored pity and says, “Oh, bless your heart, Megan.” And down here in the South we ALL know what that really means.

One day I will learn to embrace the mess; to enjoy the moment; to let go of the desire for perfection; and just be my hot mess self. I am enough for my Savior. I need to allow myself to be enough for me too. Can you say the same thing? Are you enough? Can you begin to embrace your chaos known as life?

-Megan Weatherly

P.S. Feel free to share this on Facebook or Twitter to encourage others.


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13 thoughts on “Guest Post: I am Failing at Perfection

  1. Megan this spoke to me about all the years of chaos and trying to be perfect in an imperfect world. Try as I might, I cannot measure up in my own mind so I think others must think less of me. Why is this so important at this stage of my life? God is always there for me, even when I too forget. I loved your blog.

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    1. Thank you, Vickie! You’re so sweet! It’s so easy to get bogged down in other people’s opinions of us, especially in the career field you and I have chosen. If people don’t like us, they don’t come back. It can be as simple as that. Then you add all the outside pressure to look out together. We don’t stand a chance unless we turn to Jesus. He’s ready and waiting to remind us we are enough. Always and forever.

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    2. I always love your phrase “Perfectly imperfect”. It describes many of us so well.

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  2. Great writing, Megan. I think we all have those times when we feel those same feelings. Well it just hit me that maybe as a Christian, we feel that way because we are a Christian, and so much want to be a good one. God knows our hearts, and knows we want to try. Keep up the good work. You are a natural at these blogs!

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    1. That’s a great thought Carol. Being a Christ follower changes our mindset in countless ways.

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    2. Than you so much, Carol! Writing has been a passion of mine since I was in high school. It’s just been a while since I’ve used that natural skill God blessed me with. You make a great point. As Christians we want to portray God and His love to those around us perfectly that it can be easy to forget we’re just as human as other people are. We have to allow ourselves the same amount of grace we feel like God offers others.

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  3. Love this! Thanks Megan❤️

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  4. Hello Megan, I am an insecure, imperfect wife of a husband with alzheimers. Everything you said hit home with me and I needed this message especially today! Thank you so much for sharing God’s message to all of us who are yearning to hear it!

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    1. Hey, Bonnie! I’m so glad my blog spoke to your heart! I always hope God uses it to try and help others heal and feel his love. I’m be praying for you and that you’re able to rest in His love.

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      1. Thank you

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